3.17.2006

settle the issue

restoration indeed! last night was incredible. to be honest, i can't remember the subject matter, but then, when it comes to sermons, it's rare that i can remember. but i do remember what happened after.
he called all the men up and told them to shout out to God for what they wanted. not things, but mantles, occupations, ministries. we worshiped, and then they shouted. it was a normal shout that felt obligitory and not too sincere. the music kept playing, the women kept praying.. and a few minutes later, a roar went up from the front of the room that sent chills through my body and sent me to my knees. it was as though several hundred men had shouted from the depth or their beings and out of desperation for what they needed God to do in their lives. it was incredible.

i left last night feeling refreshed and encouraged. i' ve been really down for a few weeks now.. about my job, Matt's situation, not having any money, having no time, working a lot later than i want to.. and the list goes on. i've been miserable at work, and i hate that feeling.
after the service last night, i felt like i was thinking clearly for the first time in weeks, and i was seeing differently.. as though a cloud had been over my eyes, and it had been lifted. today, i feel lighter. i'm still not happy with my situaion, but i'm okay with it. content may be a better word. i'm still seeking the Lord on what He has for me right now, and i'm hoping there's a change in the near future, but the miserable feeling has lifted. and that makes all the difference in the world.

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