chocolate & flowers, and some Donald Miller

i had lunch with my dad yesterday and cried pretty much all the way through it. without going into details, let's just say that i'm fed up with my job and the "politics" of the company, and that i've started sending my resume to other places! all of them are in the human services field, which is where i want to be long term anyway, so it would be a good move! now it's just waiting and praying that something, the right thing, comes through.
all that to say, since i had lunch with my dad yesterday, he knew how down i was. this morning, he came walking through the doors of the bank, flowers and starbucks mocha in hand. all i could do was give him a dumbfounded look; he said that after yesterday, he thought i may need some cheering up. and i cried.
my question: how many dads do that for their mid-twenties daughter??? not many. and i'm incredibly thankful. it brightened my day more than almost anything could have.

i called my mom after he left to see if she knew what her husband was up to. she said no, but did he tell me what he found out this morning?
very long story short, after one company bought another, and then it happened another time, his position in omaha is being eliminated. so either they offer him a position in Tulsa, or he looks for something else. ouch. talk about a hard decision. i know he really wants to stay in omaha.. his home has been here since he was young, his church is here, his family is here. the main consolation is that i know God is in control, and the my dad hears His voice. even if that means moving, i trust him to hear His voice. although it would be really hard to see them move.....

lots to think about. i need to constantly remind myself of what's really important. what's my chief purpose? according to a great theologian (Tozer maybe?), it is "to glorify God and enjoy Him forever". God comes first. then my husband, and my family. then my ministry. then my job. and hopefully someday, my job and my ministry will be one and the same!


from Through Painted Deserts...

"i've learned, too, that i don't really know very much about anything. i mean, i used to have all these theories about life. i thought i had everybody figured out, even God, but i don't. i think the woods, being away from all the clingy soot of commercialism, have taught me life is enormous, and i am very tiny in the middle of it. i feel, at times, like a droplet of water in a raging river. i know for a fact that as a grain of sand compares in size to the earth itself, i compare in size to the cosmos. i am that insignificant. and yet the chemicals in my brain that make me feel beauty when i look up at the stars, when i watch the sunset, indicate i must be here for a reason. i think i would sum it up this way: life is not a story about me, but it is being told to me, and i can be glad of that. i think that is the why of life and, in fact, the why of this ancient faith i am caught up in: to enjoy God. the stars were created to dazzle us, like a love letter; light itself is just a metaphor, something that exists outside of time, made up of what seems like nothing, infinite in its power, something that can be experienced but not understood, like God. relationships between men and women indicate something of the nature of God--that He is relational, that He feels love and loss. it's all metaphor, and the story is about us; it's about all of us who God made, and God Himself, just enjoying each other... "

1 comment:

Jackie said...

Good to see you posting again! I have missed reading your blogs. Definitely praying for you and that you end up in a more purpose-filled and enjoyable job soon.

If your parents end up moving to the Tulsa area (wow, what a decision to make), we should take road trips down there together... my Dad and Smom live in Broken Arrow!